Saturday, March 12, 2016

Can a Homebody Attract a Relationship?

There's no irony in the fact that I'm writing this blog post at home on a Saturday night. I completely confess to being a homebody...some of the time, anyway. It isn't that I don't like going out or being with friends, but this weekend my event with my Meetup group is taking place tomorrow, and I had nothing else planned. I'm perfectly happy relaxing at home tonight, especially as we're losing an hour due to Daylight Savings Time. 

I also mention it because I'm in the middle of reading a rather good law of attraction book by Kathryn Alice called "Love Will Find You: 9 Magnets To Bring You and Your Soulmate Together." It's pretty similar to "The Soulmate Secret", another book I've discussed on this blog before, but with some additional tidbits of advice. 

One of the chapters ("Forget the One Hundred Frogs") is about having the ability to attract love even if you're not the type of person that enjoys dating or going to singles events. Alice rejects old notions that love is a numbers game, and that you have to kiss hundreds or even thousands of frogs in order to find the right person ("what an unappetizing notion--to kiss someone you're not attracted to!") There's only one person you need to meet, she maintains, so wasting time with people you're not attracted to is...a waste of time. She's also not a fan of that other antiquated saying, "You have to put yourself out there; you won't meet anyone sitting at home, twiddling your thumbs." She then cites several examples of people she knows that did meet the love of their life with minimal effort on their part; one guy played pool with a woman at a local pool hall down the street from where he lived; one woman married the guy that installed her entertainment center, and another couple met through what is now becoming a common avenue, online dating. 

I really enjoyed this chapter of the book because it totally resonated with me, and I absolutely agree with it. For years before I discovered the law of attraction, I tried everything from online dating to a speed dating event to going to a monthly singles night at a local museum. I hated all of it, but felt that I had to do something because of the pressure from those old sayings, particularly the one about not meeting anyone by staying at home. I didn't get a single relationship or success story out of any of them. Once I learned about the law of attraction and changed my inner beliefs, I got asked out by a painter that was working on my previous company's new office space (sadly, he already had a girlfriend, although I did go out once with him) and it seemed that in general guys in person, wherever I would go, would notice me, something that I swear did not happen that often before I learned about LOA. 

You could go out with a hundred guys and go to numerous events where singles supposedly hang out. But if you don't have any focus on what you want, and don't believe you can have it, you're probably not going to have much success. I've read some weird stories about women that posted a profile online and then proceeded to date everyone and anyone that responded to their ad, no matter how creepy and/or unattractive the guys were. I don't remember if anyone of them actually found love, but I'm guessing hell no! 

So it isn't true that you'll never meet anyone if you avoid singles events, bars, and online dating. You just have to change your mindset and do the inner work on yourself. It's far better to be authentic and true to yourself, and only do activities that you REALLY want to do, and go to the places that you really want to go to that will bring you enjoyment, instead of forcing yourself to participate in something that doesn't jive with you. 

The wonderful underlying message that keeps getting repeated throughout Alice's book is that your soulmate will not miss you. You will find each other one way or another. If you're meant to be together, the universe will orchestrate ways to bring you together. And another thing about homebodies is that we're not hermits. We still leave the house, and need to go out--after all, there is work and we have to eat and put gas in our car. We're just choosy about how we spend our free time. 

Love really can happen any place, at any time, under any circumstance. So yay for homebodies and on that note, I'm going to read a bit more of this book...and go to bed early!


  1. Hi Pam! Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving comments. I totally agree with you about there being some truth to manifestations and what people put out there. I have had a list, and have knocked it back to 10 primary things now. They're on my page

    1. Thanks very much, David -- I love your blogs, and I did read the "10 Things I'm Looking For In a Woman" post. I thought it was very well thought out and not being picky at all. You have to focus on what you want and be a bit specific. No one wants the universe to just deliver any old job, car, partner, etc. to them that they won't be happy with.

  2. Pam this is amazing, funny and interesting!you can check my blog also, my last article is about relationships with men!


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