Wednesday, March 30, 2016

Interest


Twice now I've encountered the same attractive man in my office building that has checked me out. The first time I saw him was a few weeks ago while walking inside the building with my coworker, Anne. We passed him in the hallway on one of the upper floors while he was talking to another guy, and as we walked by he seemed distracted, staring and smiling at me while trying to listen to what the other guy was saying to him. When Anne and I reached the stairway to go up to the next floor, I turned back to look at the guy, and he was still looking at me, so I smiled back before we went up the stairway.

The second time happened the other day. He and another guy were pushing a bin full of wiring and what looked like computer equipment (I have no idea what he does for a living; could be some kind of maintenance work with the building.) He made the other guy pull it to the side and let us pass, so when I walked by this time I said, "Hello, how are you?" and smiled and he was friendly back. After we passed I wondered if he was still looking at me, although I didn't turn around to look. I think I would have been embarrassed (although I don't know why.)

He's tall, cute, wears a baseball cap, and is probably a little older than I am. There's also something about him that reminds me of Jimmy Stewart; it isn't that he looks like him, but has that same all-American, friendly, warm persona about him. 

However, as appreciative as I am for him and running into him twice, I don't think much of it and don't have a crush or anything like that. I'm fully aware now that I must screen men right away to make sure they're actually available. A friend asked me if he wears a wedding ring, and twice I just haven't had the chance to look at his hands. However, I'm also aware that even if he doesn't wear a ring, it doesn't mean he's not married. My boss is married with two kids and for whatever reason, doesn't wear a band. (I realize it's a personal preference but personally, if I were married I'd want my husband to wear a ring and I don't think it's a good idea for a married man not to wear one, but that's another post topic for another time.)

I'm certainly not thinking, "Oh, a soulmate!" when I see this guy. It's not that I'm pessimistic, just being impartial because I don't know anything about him. I figure if it's meant to be, things will come together and we'll get to know each other one way or another. I'm thinking more along the lines that he's an indication of my vibration and feeling better about myself and being able to attract someone attractive. A good sign, we could call him. 

More to follow on this topic, I guess...but for now, Mr. Fix-It Jimmy is a step in the right direction. 

Monday, March 21, 2016

What Would It Feel Like To Have What You Really Want?


I'm feeling quite a bit better since my last post. When I finished writing it, I took a nap. I've been reading on the law of attraction forum I like to visit that taking a nap is sometimes the best thing you can do when you're having a lot of negative emotion, because it can stop the negative thoughts cold. When you wake up, it often feels like the slate has been wiped clean and you can start over by focusing on better feeling thoughts. 

So that's exactly what I did. I also exercised last night. And then I read something on the forum that really reminded me of something that I haven't been doing lately, that I had written about just last week. 

A woman on the forum wanted a job. Her husband was working and she felt like a failure every day when he went to work and her kids went to school. 

One of the pieces of advice given to her was actually a question...why exactly did she want a job? The simple answer for a lot of people would probably be to make money and bring in an income. The moderator told her to really think about it and be specific, because it was going to create in her the feelings of having a job. She wanted to feel that she had a purpose in life, she wanted to stretch her skills, and she wanted to enjoy the company of other people in the office. Thinking about all of these were going to create feelings and emotional changes within her. And it's the feeling part that essentially rises your vibration and causes things to happen. 

I'll admit there was a time that if you asked me why I wanted a relationship, I probably wouldn't have given the best answer. "Because I don't want to die alone" is one that a lot of people say. There actually are several good reasons I want a relationship, but a major one for me right now is that I'm amazed that it's possible for two strangers, from different backgrounds and sometimes different geographical areas, that aren't related to one another can discover they have this great connection and chemistry and fall in love. I don't always get along with people in my family, and it just blows my mind that I can find someone of the opposite sex that I'll get along with like no one I'm related to, and we really get each other. I do consider it a magical experience and one of those mysteries in life that just can't be explained. There's a great old song by Chicago called "Questions 67 and 68" that captures this feeling, to me, perfectly (yes, I guess it's obvious by now I love Chicago.) 

As I said, I still have beliefs to work on and change. I'm feeling better tonight, yes, but don't quite have the 110% unwavering belief like I did while job hunting. I'll be working on it but thinking about all of the reasons I want a relationship and the feelings they evoke is definitely a step in the right direction.

Sunday, March 20, 2016

Being Gentle With Myself


So I'm going to be honest as I write this post: today I'm just not feeling it when it comes to thinking positively about love, relationships, and soulmates. I'm also PMSing and I know that has a lot to do with it, but deep down I still have a lot of work to do on my beliefs in this area. The proof was when I told my mother earlier today that I really didn't want to buy a house on my own; that I wanted to eventually purchase one with a guy. One of the reasons for that is because it's greater security; we can contribute money together towards a nice house and in today's uncertain times where layoffs happen every day, if one person lost their job the other would still be bringing in an income. But I also want it because I love the idea of starting a life together with someone and buying a house and choosing furniture is part of that partnership.

However, right after I told my mother this, tears welled up in my eyes. And right now, I'm crying as I type this. 

I'm crying because I still don't believe 100% that it's possible for me and that it's ever going to happen for me, especially with someone that has the important qualities that I want and that I have mutual attraction and chemistry with. 

I have what's known in the law of attraction circles as "resistance." Resistance is what prevents your manifestation from coming to you. It's often the big "but" your hear or feel yourself saying when you say you want something but you're not entirely convinced that you can really have it. "I want that car BUT I don't know if I'll ever have enough money for it," "I want a relationship BUT there are no good single available men around."

But apparently, resistance can be released. And on a forum I like to visit, it's been said that crying is considered a form of releasing resistance. So I am being easy on myself today, and letting myself cry. 

I also want to feel better about this topic, as the forum I visit discusses this, too, and how you can never expect to go from feeling really lousy about a subject and your beliefs to suddenly feeling 100% confident and happy about it. It just doesn't happen overnight for most people and in fact, is pretty much impossible to do. What you can do is move yourself slowly up the emotional scale by reaching for better feeling thoughts, step by step. 

The other day I stopped on the way home from work to get gas, and an attractive man who was also filling his tank kept glancing over at me. He kind of reminded me of S in a way, as he had the same kind of closely cut hair. (Neither of us smiled at each other, though...I'm not sure why. Probably mutual apprehension.) So recalling that does make me feel better, and gives me some hope. 

I'm attractive, I'm smart, and I'm basically a good person. I've made some mistakes in the past but learned my lesson and forgave myself. There's no logical reason why anyone wouldn't want to date me, and there's no way of knowing that what I want doesn't exist. 

It's going to take some time, however. I'm just going to be gentle and easy on myself until I get there. 

Saturday, March 12, 2016

Can a Homebody Attract a Relationship?


There's no irony in the fact that I'm writing this blog post at home on a Saturday night. I completely confess to being a homebody...some of the time, anyway. It isn't that I don't like going out or being with friends, but this weekend my event with my Meetup group is taking place tomorrow, and I had nothing else planned. I'm perfectly happy relaxing at home tonight, especially as we're losing an hour due to Daylight Savings Time. 

I also mention it because I'm in the middle of reading a rather good law of attraction book by Kathryn Alice called "Love Will Find You: 9 Magnets To Bring You and Your Soulmate Together." It's pretty similar to "The Soulmate Secret", another book I've discussed on this blog before, but with some additional tidbits of advice. 

One of the chapters ("Forget the One Hundred Frogs") is about having the ability to attract love even if you're not the type of person that enjoys dating or going to singles events. Alice rejects old notions that love is a numbers game, and that you have to kiss hundreds or even thousands of frogs in order to find the right person ("what an unappetizing notion--to kiss someone you're not attracted to!") There's only one person you need to meet, she maintains, so wasting time with people you're not attracted to is...a waste of time. She's also not a fan of that other antiquated saying, "You have to put yourself out there; you won't meet anyone sitting at home, twiddling your thumbs." She then cites several examples of people she knows that did meet the love of their life with minimal effort on their part; one guy played pool with a woman at a local pool hall down the street from where he lived; one woman married the guy that installed her entertainment center, and another couple met through what is now becoming a common avenue, online dating. 

I really enjoyed this chapter of the book because it totally resonated with me, and I absolutely agree with it. For years before I discovered the law of attraction, I tried everything from online dating to a speed dating event to going to a monthly singles night at a local museum. I hated all of it, but felt that I had to do something because of the pressure from those old sayings, particularly the one about not meeting anyone by staying at home. I didn't get a single relationship or success story out of any of them. Once I learned about the law of attraction and changed my inner beliefs, I got asked out by a painter that was working on my previous company's new office space (sadly, he already had a girlfriend, although I did go out once with him) and it seemed that in general guys in person, wherever I would go, would notice me, something that I swear did not happen that often before I learned about LOA. 

You could go out with a hundred guys and go to numerous events where singles supposedly hang out. But if you don't have any focus on what you want, and don't believe you can have it, you're probably not going to have much success. I've read some weird stories about women that posted a profile online and then proceeded to date everyone and anyone that responded to their ad, no matter how creepy and/or unattractive the guys were. I don't remember if anyone of them actually found love, but I'm guessing hell no! 

So it isn't true that you'll never meet anyone if you avoid singles events, bars, and online dating. You just have to change your mindset and do the inner work on yourself. It's far better to be authentic and true to yourself, and only do activities that you REALLY want to do, and go to the places that you really want to go to that will bring you enjoyment, instead of forcing yourself to participate in something that doesn't jive with you. 

The wonderful underlying message that keeps getting repeated throughout Alice's book is that your soulmate will not miss you. You will find each other one way or another. If you're meant to be together, the universe will orchestrate ways to bring you together. And another thing about homebodies is that we're not hermits. We still leave the house, and need to go out--after all, there is work and we have to eat and put gas in our car. We're just choosy about how we spend our free time. 

Love really can happen any place, at any time, under any circumstance. So yay for homebodies and on that note, I'm going to read a bit more of this book...and go to bed early!

Friday, March 4, 2016

How I Manifested A Walking Buddy


So this is a "smaller", "less important" law of attraction success story, but a success story nonetheless. The company I'm now working for is small; there's only about 13 employees including myself. It's certainly nothing to complain about, but a few days in I realized I was just a little bit lonely around lunchtime. They had me using the CFO's office while he was on vacation, and because there's not many people, there just isn't a lot of socialization and people tend to go out or eat lunch by themselves. I had lunch at the table in the office for a few days in a row before I decided that I really wanted a lunch buddy. 

Part of my motivation was that my last company, which was larger, was a lot more cliquey, and also full of people in other departments a good ten years younger than me who went to lunch together. I would mostly take a walk outside if it was nice during lunchtime, and then eat my meal at my desk. 

I didn't stress about it, and I didn't wonder how it was going to happen with what seemed like limited options in the office. I was perfectly open to meeting someone from another company working in the same building that maybe I'd hit it off with. Either way, I realized that feeling lonely was exactly the wrong thing to do, since that feeling was just going to attract more situations of feeling lonely. So I made the effort to instead imagine what it would be like to have company for lunch, to feel a new friendship. And then I let it go and forgot about it.

It was Wednesday when I was heating up my lunch in the kitchen and this woman named Anne that works on the operations team popped her head in and asked if I would like to join her for a walk. She walks the stairs and floors of our office building when the weather is lousy or too cold, and outside when it's nice. Needless to say, I was pleasantly surprised--and delighted. I wrapped my lunch up and joined her, and got to get some orientation on my building's layout in the process. 

Now we've walked together every day for about 20 minutes or so except for two days where she was busy dealing a problem. She's older than I am and has a daughter in college, but we hit it off. She's friendly, pleasant, and really great company. And to be honest, I'm enjoying having a walking buddy better than sitting and eating with somebody, where it sometimes gets hard to carry on a conversation when you have limited time to eat. I'm really grateful for her camaraderie. 

It's a funny thing about the universe, but you often get something even better than what you were intending. It seems this process of feeling the feeling of being there, knowing it'll happen easily, and then letting it go is really working for me lately to attract a lot of nice things. 

Like This Post? Share It!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...