Thursday, December 8, 2016

The Easy Come, Easy Go Friendship

Last week a woman I had been friends with for about 6 or 7 months decided rather abruptly that she didn't want to be friends with me anymore. Before I get into this post, let me say that there was no real fight to speak of and no drama; more that she did something that hurt my feelings but refused to see that she had done anything wrong, and didn't apologize for her behavior. When I wrote back and said I was hurt, listed the times I'd been a friend to her, and then added that her action didn't fit my definition of friendship, she responded back with one word (phrase, really): "OK." And then she removed me from Facebook. She wasn't even willing to discuss the disagreement. So I removed her from my Meetup group.

It all happened REALLY fast and once it did, I felt this relief. For the past month or two, virtually everything she did or said was not jiving with my idea of a fulfilling friendship. I met her and another mutual friend at one of my Meetup events late in the winter of this year, and the three of us hit it off. She told the both of us over email that she loved the open communication and honesty in our friendship. But lately she'd been acting a little strange, and then she got downright controlling and manipulative. I found out from the mutual friend (that I'm pretty sure is no longer going to hang out with her) that she'd been acting this way towards her as well -- moreso than what I experienced. This past weekend I met up with the mutual friend for dinner and drinks and she said our former friend sent her an angry text after one of our dinner outings in the fall, saying that she really wanted to hang out and have drinks and that she couldn't believe she was home on a Saturday night at 9 PM. The behavior was baffling to us as she never mentioned ever that she wanted to hang out after the meal and drink (my other friend and I are not drinkers and in fact, she likes to make it an early night on the weekends because she works out early on Sunday mornings.)

Long story short, after it ended I realized she was a lot like my boss at my last job; no matter what you said or did, she couldn't be pleased, and always wanted to have her own way. I was also getting the vibes from her lately that she was a really unhappy person (despite telling me that she was into positivity and the law of attraction when I first met her, which is why we seemed to hit it off in the first place.) My other friend said they went to a Meetup event together where the first thing out of her mouth to the group was, "I'm so-and-so...and I hate my job." Then she proceeded to talk about it for 10 minutes. Not exactly the best way to make a good first impression. 

She also publicly told a Facebook page she ran that she received "virtually no support from friends" when her dog recently needed surgery (for a non life-threatening injury.) I felt like the remark was directed at me, which was baffling as she and our mutual friend emailed her and asked about her dog several times. But I kept my mouth shut about it. She then told her Facebook group (which I was a part of) that if people weren't going to participate and post on a regular basis that she was going to shut the page down. So I DID post to her page to be nice -- twice, as a mater of fact -- and two weeks later she removed me from the group. That's what started the email correspondence last week that led to her unfriending me (LOL.)

Sometimes we meet people, all seems great, and then in a few months they start showing us the red flags that hint at their true colors. And, just like those two almost manifestations I talked about in my first video, if something isn't a good match for you and your conviction about what you do want is strong enough, chances are you're going to repel them right out of your life, which I believe is what happened here. 

I wasn't even upset about it -- easy come, easy go. I had a hunch recently that things weren't going to work out with her. With so many other friendships that are wonderful and new ones to be made, I believe in abundance and attracting those people that are a good match for my vibration. 

No comments:

Post a Comment

Like This Post? Share It!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...